Wednesday, June 23, 2010

A Must Read for all of you who want to know what to say to me all the time!

Since we could all use a good laugh, I asked some friends and Twitter followers to send in their most hated adages. I know you've heard them all before (obviously), but I just couldn't believe how many there were! Here's a tiny compilation. Enjoy — today, they're not directed at you!

1. It happens when you're not looking.
"This is just bull. Some people find people when they're looking; some don't. You're not doing anything wrong by going out and meeting people." —Beth

2. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
"I dated a guy whose last name was Fish. People just had a BLAST with that one." —Kelly

3. So, why are you single?
"I generally dislike this question. I mean honestly, if I knew why, I don't think I would be single right now, now would I?!" —Erica

4. You're too picky.
"This may be true, but it feels like I'm getting criticized for my taste, vision, and close-mindedness — when I'm already down." —Sarah

5. You'll find the right person for you.
—Kelly

6. He's out there.
—Kelly

7. It was just bad timing.
"Like it's so easy to dismiss a guy on such an emotionless and objective reason." —Taryn

8. Just have fun with it!
"Um, don't tell me how to date in my thirties when you got married at 24." —Maya

9. Have you tried online dating?
"Duh!" —Elisa

10. He just wasn't the right guy for you.
"I know! That's what I'm complaining about!" —Elisa

11. Well, when my boyfriend and I first got together…
"Wait, I still want to talk about me." —Elisa

12. When the time is right, you will meet someone.
—Betsy

13. Wow, I wish I were single and in your shoes!
"Really?! I'm pretty sure you CAN be single if you actually want to be. That there is an attainable dream, so if you aren't messing with me right now out of pity (which I suspect you are), please go for it!" —Kim

14. Your turn next [at weddings].
—Natlondon, via Twitter

15. It will happen when you least expect it.
—dlegas05, via Twitter

16. Some guy is going to come along and ruin your career/life plans.
"I am 32 and no one has ruined the last 10 years of plans." —frolicblog, via Twitter

17. But you're so pretty! Why don't you have a boyfriend?
"There's just no graceful way to answer that." —earnesteats, via Twitter

18. It just wasn't meant to be.
"Any of these platitudes are exponentially more annoying when coming from the mouths of smug marrieds." —Reberoodle, via Twitter

19. Sure, my guy rescues kids from abusive homes, donated my sister a kidney, and picks up fresh flowers for me daily on his way home from work, but will he QUIT IT with the sports on TV already?
"Single people just hate to be complained to about petty relationship stuff. If you do this, I'm not going to want to hang out with you. (In fact, maybe I'll call your boyfriend and ask him if he wants to grab a beer and watch the Yankees game?)" —Kim

Bottom line, if you're in a relationship or married and you don't have any specific, original advice or wisdom for your single friend—and you must use an established saying — we would prefer to hear neutral ones like, "This too shall pass" or "Take it one day at a time." They are so much more helpful and comforting — you have no idea!

Also of note: not one person I polled mentioned they were tired of hearing, "He's just not that into you." I think that's because it's not condescending. And apparently, it's not overused. So that one is still okay to say. For now.

6 comments:

Elmer said...

I thought about posting that article too...you beat me to it! It's a good one. :)

Marissa Marie said...

I hate the picky line because seriously, to NOT be picky about who you marry is a scary prospect! And I hated it when people said that it was so easy and you're so lucky when you're single. Being married is soooo hard. Having kids is soooo hard. First of all, different things are hard for different people, and second of all, there's no one path in life that's called easy street. And third of all, people who say that must never have been denied a blessing that they want more than anything. If they had, they would understand that you're not looking for a perfect life, you just want someone special to share it with.

Kelly said...

Come on guys we all know that if we take all that advice and roll it up and use it we would be married right now. We would be living the dream. This is actually a how to article....

Kimi said...

Well Kelly - that's exactly why I posted it. I've already tried a couple this morning with guys at work and I think it's going well (they are all married...but still! progress is progress, right??)

tami said...

Good advice there,Kimi, for those of us who want to be of some comfort :)

The Only Rune You Know said...

Well, Kimi,

I always are of the kind that is willing to set up my friends and play match maker.

I am in Eugene, but I do know a couple of guys that are single in Utah at the moment. I could let you have their number (that is if you want to) and there is one guy I know in Eugene, Oregon, if you think you would like to come this way.